The Hilarity of Life

“[Humanity] has unquestionably one really effective weapon—laughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecution—these can lift at a colossal humbug—push it a little—weaken it a little, century by century, but only laughter can blow it to rags and atoms at a blast. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand. — Mark Twain”

I saw this quote today while browsing online. I seemed to have had a little extra time prior to the start of my group therapy session as I had prepared the materials before breaking free from the office yesterday. #HighFive This quote reminded me of what I would classify as a precious moment with my significant other this past Sunday. I’m not sure if he would identify the moment as, “precious”, because I was being awfully silly. I’m starting to crack up again as I type this. Bahahahahahahahahhaha; Pardon me. Let me share what happened.

So, we were both having a well-deserved Lazy Sunday. We were bumming it, nibbling on snacks (I even had a beer), watching TV, showing each other funny stuff on our phones (gotta love social media), and exchanging touch, tickles, kisses, and my favorite, SNUGGLES!!!! One thing I showed him was this video sent by my BFF, which she found on Facebook, of a grown man walking across a busy main road in our town, Booty-Ball-Naked, acting out erratically. Sure, it provoked a few chuckles, but as a mental health professional, I couldn’t help but to be concerned that he may have been under the influence of something (i.e. PCP) and/or actively psychotic. Hopefully he gets the help that he needs. Anyway, somehow that led to us talking about terrible police sketches.  

I proceeded to google search “bad police sketches” and skimmed the results under the images tab. We got a kick out of those. We chuckled at this one again.

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Some of you may recognize it because it got a lot of attention on social media, but for some reason this one
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had us rolling!!!, I mean, done!!! I lost it. I probably laughed hysterically for about 15 minutes. We were lying opposite ends of the couch and I wanted to stand up because I couldn’t breathe, but the cackling had drained all of my energy. I was on the brink of choking, my eyes were crying, I was gasping for air and trying not to snort, I was slapping my thighs and trying my hardest to collect my silly self. His butt just laid there embracing my legs with his and let me do my thing. My goodness, I needed that!

What I acknowledged was that I haven’t been able to let loose and be a goof ball in a while. On a serious note, I have been fighting debilitating depression and anxiety for several months while trying to maintain my household, livelihood, relationships and my overall health. I make it do what it does; no doubt about that, but it has been extra challenging. Upon reflection, it seems as if I have been moving further and further away from the darkness the past couple of months. Sunday was a great moment and I felt blessed to be comfortable in my own skin, vulnerable with him, and, essentially, able to smile again.  

God is good. It’s the little things.

#happyhumpday from #unitedindependence!

**disclaimer in no way do I find crime funny and I don’t have any idea of the stories behind these sketches. Don’t bother commenting with some overly sensitive nonsense** #peacebewithyou

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Reminiscing

I heard this song randomly today and thought about my old big head Dad. As I was bobbing my head my mind took a power walk down memory lane. I know that he had a lot of jams from “back in the day”, but this one triggered a flashback I have of him humming the beat and feeling the groove. My childhood was something else, but in no way was it all bad. I was/am loved. Reminiscing…. #igotitmade #musicislife #gratefulforthelittlethings

A Good Woman Is Hard To Find

Following a brief conversation with a group of coworkers, a female asked a male. “So, how are you and your new girl doing?” I don’t know if he was trying to show off or what. But he jokingly stated, “I mean, she’s there, but she might not be for long.” The female chuckled and asked, “Why?” He stated something about her complaining that he doesn’t treat her well and that she’s referred to him as disrespectful. He said something about him texting some other woman. I don’t know. I recalled that when he first mentioned her several months ago he was star struck and indicated that he thought she was everything that he’d want in a woman. I wish that I had the time to engage him, but I had to see a client. Oh well. When I was leaving the conversation I heard him say, “A good woman is hard to find.”

Um, I thought to myself, “Are you sure that a good woman is hard to find or is a good woman hard to keep, bruh?” I hear men say that they want a good woman, yet when they get one they don’t know how to treat her. Words of advice: Learn how to interact with her, respect her, value her, and love her. Don’t pride yourself on the fact that you managed to lure her in, pride yourself on your ability to hold on to her and the relationship.

:-\ SMH.
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I Always Land On My Feet

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Soaring high in this abstract sky, so high that my face is zipping through the wispy clouds.

My body feels light and airy, my tummy is laced with butterflies, and my mind is delightfully responsive to my oxytocin-filled brain.

“Ahhhhh”, I let out a deep breath, close my eyes, and chuck my hands up with the muscle of faith.

There aren’t any barriers, borders, or boundaries up here; it’s a rather freeing experience.

However, just as I become comfortable and trusting in the adventure, life rips the magical carpet from beneath me.

“Gasp!”, I try not to become overcome with fear and panic as I take a nose dive, heart first, towards the cold earth.

But, like a boisterous feline, I always land on my feet.

I brush my shoulders off, adjust myself, pick a direction, and start walking…

They say what goes up must come down and it’s all in the landing!

It Was A Good Day Or Weekend Rather

5:00AM this morning, the cool groove, “Footsteps In The Dark” by The Isley Brothers sounds and casually wakes me up. As I become increasingly aware I can’t help myself from singing, “Today Was A Good Day”, by Ice Cube. You know how it goes, “Just wakin up in the morning gotta thank God…” And know that I’m always sure to thank the good Lord every day that I open my bright eyes! I usually choose an alarm that’s going to kick my day off rizight, ya feel meh? #musicislife. Wait a minute, now that I think about it, seeing “Straight Outta Compton” probably influenced my current alarm choice. But, I don’t think I was trying to wake up to “F*ck da Police”

Anyway, even though I always wake up thankful, and my hype alarms get it rocking, that can only get me but so far. Some days I find myself dragging ass because I’m overworked and under paid, and though rewarding and necessary, my career itself can be incredibly draining. I’m also hungry with a taste for achievement and success. I like to go out and go get. I like tapping into new things and new experiences, but there’s never enough time in the day for all of the stuff that I dream up. The hypothyroidism also doesn’t offer much help. **Utters Loud Sigh**

No matter what though, I keep going. I keep savoring life, living, doing, and being. For instance, this past week was one of the best weeks that I’ve had in a long while, which prompted me to write this post. Last week Thursday I had the day off from work along with the bf. We hung out and prepped for his art show in Washington, DC earlier in the day, which was followed by some additional quality time before getting ready for and attending the main event later that evening. That Friday, we attended our friends’ intimate outdoor wedding. I adored witnessing their love and joy. It totally put me in a fantastic mood. Everyone looked amazing and it was just perfect. On Saturday mid-morning I said goodbye to my love and finally headed home before stopping to my 8 year old nephew’s BBQ birthday party (wish I had more time to spend with the big boy and the family), but I had a concert already scheduled. My sorority sister and I attended the Chris Brown concert at the Jiffy Lube Stadium that evening. We had a blast letting loose like all them youngins out there and met some rather stimulating people. Lastly, on Sunday, I dashed over to the church to link with my god baby, her parents, and other family and friends to witness her baptism and to officially become one of her godparents. We had a small reception afterwards and I couldn’t have asked for a better way to conclude the weekend.

Sunday evening when I finally got home and reflected on all of the above, all I could do was smile as I bask in the moment. I thanked God again for all of the blessings afforded to me and took my squat butt to bed. That good ol’ Monday morning came quiiiiiccccckkkk!

Happy Thursday Readers. Stay Blessed.
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Fruits of Your Labor

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“You have to learn how to slow down and enjoy the fruits, man”, says my BF in one of the long, random conversations we had over this past weekend. I recall getting into one of my rants of how I’m overwhelmed and tired from doing so much, yet, in the same breath, I talked about how I wanted to add more to my heavily piled plate! He took the time to highlight what I sounded like and he couldn’t have been more right. Oh my goodness! I do need to chill!

It’s funny that we are much alike in that we are very ambitious, determined, and driven… Oh and FOCUSED MaaaaAAAANNN! Some may also group us into the Stubborn and Hard-headed category, but that’s a conversation for a different day. Anyway, being so ambitious, determined, and driven can also mean that we do not know how to sit back, relax, and enjoy the fruits of our labor. I believe we both call each other out on this.

Speaking for myself, I guess I have operated like a well-oiled machine for so long that I don’t know what to do with myself when I’m not working on something or thinking about working on something. They say that you gotta work hard to play hard, but over the last several years I have found myself working extremely hard, accomplishing goals left and right, but not taking the time to match my play.

Now this isn’t to say that I never cut loose and enjoy myself from time to time. I’ve made some good memories, but I’m currently feeling extreme burnout. I’m all out of juice like a broke down hoopty on I-95. I’m getting to the point where I feel like something has to give. The funny thing is, I actually have some control here and I simply need to make a plan towards a solution for my problem and see it through. Is it weird that I feel guilty for resting and taking a time out for myself? Can any of you relate to this feeling? I know it’s because of some bogus fear/unrealistic expectation I place upon myself and I just need to push that load of crap aside and live.

I’m looking forward to it! Life is no joke short; I don’t want to waste anymore of whatever time I have left here on bullsh*t. Our conversation really got me hyped for doing more for me. Though I’m a Beachbody Coach, we talked about me joining a gym to have access to weights, etc. So, I went and toured a few. LA Fitness and Sport & Health were nice! Um, Planet Fitness didn’t do it for me. Lol. Then he suggested that I create my own workout space in my home, just for me. Hmmmm, that sounded good because I don’t have too much time, but for some reason I didn’t think I could do it. “I’m just going to join a gym”, I thought to myself, but then he encouraged it more and that idea became more appealing.

I became excited to have this private little space in my home for me and started putting it into action!

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I moved stuff around (like that monstrous treadmill), purchased a weight bench (and put that joker together) and bam! Check it out. Lol! It’s not fancy, but it’s cute, mine, and functional. I just need to get a heavier set of weights, a barbell, and the Body Beast fitness program from Beachbody. Ooooooo, I can’t wait! Really, it is the little things. Putting that room together has lifted my spirits and I have been excited all week working out in there (beats working out in my bedroom)!

If you are feeling the burnout like I am, I encourage you, me, us, to chillax a bit in efforts to recognize how much our hard work has paid off.

Here’s to enjoying the fruits!

Pillow Talk

Lying next to you is like enjoying a warm and sweet cup of coffee first thing in the morning while sitting under the sunrays on a patio near the beach. Snuggled on your chest, your soft breath and rhythmic heartbeat are as soothing as waves crashing into the shoreline. Being with you is like being on vacation! You are pure escape from the extremely rushed and anxiety producing American hustle and bustle that I live on the daily.

I love how you look at me; I feel a jolt of sheer bliss when I catch your innocent gazes. When our eyes meet, I wonder if we are thinking the same thing. Do you think to yourself, “I wonder what she’s thinking?” because I am wondering what you could possibly be thinking. I love how you feel when we sneak little caresses and kisses in between our conversation. I love our conversations about something or nothing. I love our Pillow Talk.

#happyhumpday readers

Time Well Spent

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I ran across this on FB and it left me pondering. I have an idea of how I think things should be, but what I actually have doesn’t quite meet that expectation. We all know that things not meeting your expectations typically equals disappointment. However, in this case it isn’t a bad thing at all. After seeing my significant other in his environment and around his friends, while he was in the zone, I was provided with a new perspective and understanding about who he is. One’s friends can provide a lot of insight about a person. No one is perfect, and we may not vibe well in a few areas, but he is truly something and I’m delighted that our paths had the opportunity to cross. Though things with us are a bit unconventional, and sometime seem more complicated than I feel is necessary, we both have clearly invested time and the experience is priceless. Invested time is a big deal because time ain’t cheap! Word to the wise, if you feel like you are wasting time, then simply stop. Guess we’ll rock until one of us decides to stop.

**Raises Glass** Until then……

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