Frustration…

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Frustration is a general symptom of the “Things just aren’t going my way” Syndrome.  Likewise, it is a common symptom of the “Everyone around me  f***ing sucks and I keep hoping that they’ll stop f***ing sucking, but they never f***ing do” Syndrome.

I am typically optimistic and hopeful, but today the frustrations are running ever so high and I’m honestly baffled by the things that keep happening. I have been sitting back and watching out for people’s words to finally match their behavior(s) and after so many consecutive fails, my hopefulness decreases after each instance. Damn, is it going to get better? Sh*t! Or will my hopefulness decrease until there’s nothing left?

Ever feel like you wanna gouge your own eyeballs out and disconnect? Don’t tell me I’m the only one. :-\ I’m asking for the good Lord to give me strenf aka strength!

#happywednesday hope you enjoyed the read. Feel free to like and/or comment. LoL. This post was triggered by me running across the attached meme and actually having a really stressful day. But, know that I’m a boss, am grabbing the day by its balls, and making it do what it do. Don’t let anything/anyone bring you down my loves! *Muahz*

That instrumental doe….. “Frustration” lol.

First!

Tell us about your first day at something — your first day of school, first day of work, first day living on your own, first day blogging, first day as a parent, whatever.

I went on a solo vacation trip a few weeks ago to a mountainous area in my home state (I’m fortunate to have access to vacation property). The drive is actually only about max 2.5hours away from my home, thus out of town, but still relatively close by if I needed to make a break. Lol. Originally, I had reserved the vacation time and was excited to share and enjoy the property with my special someone, but things changed and that plan was no longer applicable. :-\ With those unforeseen changes I didn’t make the effort to either rent my place out for a profit, or invite friends to join me. So, I planned to follow through with my time off and go by my damn self.

I mean, Heck! Why not? I desperately needed the break, I worked hard for it, and am totally capable of doing whatever I want. At the very last minute I did extend an invite to friends, but it was too short-notice, and frankly I’m glad. As the day of my departure came near, I began to feel both anxious and extremely excited for my trip. I noticed my thoughts cycled between empowerment and self-doubt. I have never vacationed solo before, but I told myself, “honey, you got this”. 😉 I researched activities and set daily goals for while I was away. I prepared myself and off I went!

While away, I got interesting feedback from people in my life. Some questioned me, “Is everything alright?”. Some showed concerned, “Please be careful!”. Some others showed, what’s the word I’m looking for…….. Hate, oh yes, that’s it, “Who vacations by themselves?” Lol! People are so funny, I tells ya. Hate only fuels a person like me, so thank you!

The first day of my trip, I instantaneously felt reinvigorated! I felt super excited and accomplished. It was amazing! Especially since for the past two or three months or so I had been feeling so many negative things (overwhelmed, work burnout, rejected, unloved, unattractive, devalued, undeserving, unappreciated, just to name a few). Ewe! Feels gross to even write that, but I was beat; I was really spent and exhausted! I am only human and not above hardship and emotional turmoil; I realize I was simply going through a transition period.

But, let me tell you, the removal from my daily living environment was exactly what I needed to reevaluate myself….family, social network/relationships, career, passions, all included…. That first day helped boost my confidence and was the start to a shift in perspective. I took in the fresh crisp air of a higher altitude, the beauty in the landscape, and the calm and peaceful vibe of the small town and got back on track! I remember feeling completely content with myself. I was all smiles and actually satisfied. I was grateful and appreciative for the opportunity to even get away. I felt blessed. I felt my strength increase and felt change coming. I felt bold and brave. I felt worth more than I was getting and started on a revised game plan. It was wonderful! I totally recommend a scheduled time-out for everyone!

Stay focused and stay blessed Readers! Don’t allow anything to stand in your way. Prove the naysayers wrong!

Enjoy a few fotos!
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DP:First

The Disconnect

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“I love you”.
Three powerful words that are often times placed on a pedestal.
Three magical words that can potentially come with a high price.
Three little words with a rather big meaning.
Three special words that, frankly, are overrated.

As I mature those most sought after and most misused words are starting to depreciate in value. I’ve been subjected to to those words numerous times by a variety of people of differing relationship levels, but only a small fraction of people truly meant its “true” meaning, I suppose??? I mean, what is love really? Hmm, don’t ask my emotionless heart, disengaged from love.

#coldasice #emotionless #whatisloveanyway #iloveyou #iloveyounot #disconnected

Random thoughts communicated here, can anyone else relate? Have you ever felt emotionally disconnected from others?

DP:TurnedUpNoses

#BOOM

“Your genetics load the gun. Your lifestyle pulls the trigger.”, Mehmet Oz

I presented this quote to my clients in group therapy session the other day, and it really got their attention. It lead to a great discussion. Both how it is metaphorically written and it’s powerful message is captivating. Personally, I have been working on revamping my lifestyle in efforts to get closer to my individual goals. It has not been easy; by no means is this a stress-free mission. However, once I got the ball a-rolling and started bringing attention to the gang of pink elephants in the room, my motivation towards positive change increased.

I know I am not the only person who has tried blaming their family for their limitations/shortcomings. Not to discredit the major impact of one’s environment on development, but regardless of one’s upbringing, change is possible. This quote reinforces just that. It is through change that things happen and can propel you onward. How inspiring! So quit making excuses and stop playing the blame game.

I am curious as to how many people can relate. How many of you have defied the odds and spearheaded change within a maladaptive family system? Considering my family history and the non-traditional things I was exposed to as a child, who would have thought I would be the beautiful, educated, and successful woman I am today? I am truly blessed! Feel free to share…

So You Wanna Play With Magic?

Your mind’s logical attempt to inhibit you, “Remember, you weren’t looking for this.” “This is not a part of the plan.” You want to listen, but your emotions seem to have won this round. Imagine your Reasonable Mind (where you think logically and your behaviors are planned and calculated) in a steel cage match ring with your Emotion Mind (where your thoughts and behaviors are controlled mostly by your emotions). The two states of mind go at it; and just when you think your logic will prevail, your Emotion Mind Big Show Choke Slams your Reasonable Mind, pinning it down for 1, 2, 3—–DING! Your heart flutters as your Emotion Mind walks away with the championship belt. That victory has now left you in a place you have both feared and avoided for several years…A little place known as VULNERABLE!

We are taught that vulnerability is a sign of weakness. I agree that vulnerability is rather frightening, especially if you have ever had your feelings hurt, and I mean hurt for real. However, we have all experienced vulnerability, even the toughest of the tough. I like to view vulnerability as a vehicle which drives us toward strength, courage, enhanced abilities, and increased emotional stability. When feeling uncomfortably vulnerable, ask yourself, what is it about your situation that has made you feel this way? Engage in self-exploration and self-reflection and dissect the situation. Hopefully you will uncover the deeper issue and be able to work through it and progress, versus, run away from it and repeat undesired thought and behavior patterns.

I say, why not safely let your guards down, and within healthy boundaries decide to take a risk, and play with a little magic? Come on, I dare you to open yourself up to new opportunities.

~Hope you enjoy the jam! 😉

CONFIDENCE!!! GET SOME!

Hands down, a confident man is a sexy man! Oooooweeeee! When I join forces with my future co conspirator in efforts to take over the world by way of endless knowledge, power, holy matrimony, procreation and family, and community service, trust and believe I will not hesitate to “tell everybody” about the CONFIDENT man by my side….and how fortunate he is to have teamed up with me, of course. 😉

Enjoy Aloe Blacc’s “The Man”; he kills it!

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